So we need to address this grunge thing. You know I grew up in the nineties, so indulge me. Here’s the thing. I don’t care what’s all the rage. And I don’t care if the creative director of Yves Saint Laurent has dropped the Yves and has gone insane. (See photos below of the fw/2013 collection if you don’t believe me. Really? That’s what you send down the runway? Seriously? Not April Fool’s? Not j/k lol?)
Look. Our style was so miserable in the nineties that we vowed never to dress that way again. In fact, most people say that when they grow up. What were we thinking, right? The oversized clothes, the pink hair, the flannel flannel and more flannel – it seemed an outfit just wasn’t complete unless there was a flannel shirt over it. Doesn’t match? Too hot? Let’s just tie that sucker round the waist. There! Now THAT looks good. NOT! (Remember NOT? Another dumb thing that was born in the nineties and died there. For more dumb nineties stuff, check out our first post on the topic. I thought it would be our first and last post on the subject, but then grunge got in the way and so)
Look. Do what you want. Hey, I feel pretty grungy sometimes, too. Just yesterday I was thinking about how good it was that the way I was dressed was actually in style. Heh. But it wasn’t on purpose. I didn’t go out of my way to look like a slob. So here is my list of the only ten reasons you ever need to be wearing grungy outfits. If you fall under any one of these categories, you’re golden. Otherwise, rethink it. Trust me. You won’t regret it.
1. You’re Neil Young. Why? Because he’s the Godfather of Grunge. That’s right. In Greek, he’d be your Νονό.
2.You’ve shaved one side of your head. If you have enough guts to do that, you’re fucking awesome and can wear whatever the hell you want.
3. You’re a model and have to wear those clothes because it’s your job. But, you’re a model. So you probably still look amazing. Errrr…right?
4. You are an Olsen twin.
5. You woke up for work at 6 am and got dressed in the dark because your boyfriend is still sleeping and gets all hissy when you switch on the lights. So you just threw on a grey tank, old sweater, jeans and boots. And so you’re grunge for the day. (me, yesterday)
6. You are a hobo.
7. You are in grades 7-12. Or, you’re an undergraduate in college. Ok…you’re still working on your master’s degree, and so you’re not really in the ‘real’ world yet. But you’re pushing it. How do you expect people to take you seriously if you’re walking around looking like that? Unless you work in retail – for a company which is making money off the stuff…in which case…occupational hazard. Forgiven.
8. You are still living in the 90’s. You think that if you dress the way Johnny Depp and Kate Moss did back then, that you’ll look like them. You’ll be like them. Let me let you in on a little secret. You are not Johnny Depp. You are not Kate Moss. You are you. So be that person. Do it now.
9. You are Bridget Fonda and Matt Dillon on the set of the film Singles. Oh wait. Yup. That was in the nineties. My bad.
How about Winona Ryder and Ethan Hawke on the set of the movie Reality Bites? Nope. Still nineties.
10. You are aware of the fact that you’re attempting to relive a movement that was less about fashion than it was about functionality. That the guys they say were “grunge,” guys like Kurt Cobain, came from Seattle, where it’s cold and raining and wet all the time. Just ask Efi. You’re aware that people like Kurt Cobain couldn’t really give a shit about what they looked like. And that’s why they looked like that. But you don’t care. You still like it. So be it. I wash my hands of it. Grunge it up all day and all night. See if I care. Wear those overalls while you’re at it. Tie a flannel shirt around the waist. There ya go.
As for me, there are days when I won’t be able to avoid the grunge look. Life gets in the way. On those days, I’ll be happy I’m walking round looking like a slob, or looking like I’m stuck in another era, or looking like a hobo – and still “in style.” Until this, too, passes. And then…well, I guess then I’ll be out of excuses 😉